Disapointing Results

Shortly after writing my last post on Friday, I got the call.  Unfortunately it was not the news we had hoped for.  I do have persistent cancer.  I am scheduled to have surgery on June 18.   We're sad for the life changes that this surgery will include, but we are hopeful that it will result in a cure for me.   If the cancer has traveled to my lymph nodes, surgery will be cancelled and no cure will be possible.  The reality of this affecting my life expectancy is hitting hard, and we're all grieving right now.  By all it's not just me, Darryl and the girls, it's our parents, siblings, and friends.  I meet with my doctors on Tuesday to go over details of my surgery.   There will be lots of doctor's appointments in the next few weeks in preparation for surgery.  However, there will be no more testing.  My lymph nodes will be tested on my surgery day.  So I will be put to sleep and wake up not knowing what happened or didn't happen.  We are holding on to the hope that the surgery will go ahead on June 18, and I will finally be cancer free.  My recovery will be long and difficult, but I know I can do it.   I can do it because the other option is worse.  Please continue to pray for us.  Pray that my lymph nodes will be clear and the surgery will go as expected.  Pray that we will be able to stay strong over the next weeks as we wait for the surgery and stay hopeful.  We continue to hold onto our faith in God.  We believe He could heal me in a heartbeat, and we question why He has chosen not to.  But we also continue to trust that He has the final say, and He "works all things for good to those who love Him".   He has continued to give us peace even though we are living in the midst of a nightmare.  He gives us hope that He will continue to hold us in His hand and give us what we need to face each day of the crazy journey that we are on.  He has provided an incredible network of loving people around us, who are helping us cope.

We may continue to blog on occasion, but there will likely be no new news until after surgery.  Right now my focus has to be on my family and on preparing mentally, physically, and spiritually for this surgery.  So new posts may be scarce.  Thank you for following so far.  We hope we will post good news at the end of June. 

Still Waiting

We are still waiting for my biopsy results.  I know lots of people have been checking the blog to find out what's going on.  Our silence is not bad news, we just don't know anything more yet.  We were supposed to receive them a week ago.  We found out yesterday there was a back log in pathology and my samples only got looked at this week.  They are currently being examined carefully (extra testing is required because it's radiated samples, which makes things more tricky).  We most likely will not get the results until next week sometime.

Thank you to everyone who is praying for us.  We know hundreds of you are praying, and we feel it.  We have this unexplainable peace as a whole family.  We know God is taking care of us and has the final say on these results.  We completely believe that whatever the results are, He will carry us through whatever we need to do next.  Please keep praying!  Pray for healing, calmness and PATIENCE.

I have filled my waiting time with painting....The only good part of having so much waiting time is that I've painted all the trim in my house (only 2 bedrooms left).  I feel really good and am able to be busy, which helps me get through each day.  Today I'm preparing for a garage sale tomorrow.  So my life looks and feels pretty normal, except every time the phone rings my heart starts racing. 

We will post news when we get it.