Wednesday, 1 April 2015

A Birthday and More Back Pain

Last week I celebrated my 39th birthday.  Darryl took me away for a few days to celebrate, which I really appreciated.  It's so great to reach another birthday when you live a life unsure of how much time you have, but it's hard to think about what the following year will hold.  So it was nice to get away and focus on us and almost pretend that this life we are living isn't reality.  Birthdays bring on a lot of reflection time for me, but this year I chose to not spend too much time reflecting.  (Sometimes the reflecting is tiring).  I hope with all of my heart that I will live to celebrate my 40th birthday.  But many days I'm fearful of what I will have to live through to get to 40.  When I reflect on a year ago, it's crazy to think about some of the phases I've had to live through.....particularly surgery and everything associated with it.  I have endured more than I had hoped, and I wonder what this next year will hold.  Will there be another hard phase?  Will it be more difficult than anything I've ever experienced?  Then I remind my mind to slow down and enjoy today.  Today is where I work hard to stay focused on.

Unfortunately, after returning home from my birthday celebration, my lower back pain has returned in full force.  It hurts to my core, and everything I do takes so much effort because every movement hurts.  I'm back to physio 3 times a week.  I think it's improving, but I also know that sometimes it has to hurt more before it gets better.  Everyday I feel the reality of radiation and its effects on my body.  I will never be me without radiation.  I can never reverse the damage that is done.  I can work with what I have, but it will always be hard work.  My entire pelvis is intertwined with hard, scar tissue.  As of recently, I need to take pain killers fairly frequently to manage all of this.  And even when it hurts, I have to keep moving to prevent more hardening.  For those of you who pray for me regularly, please pray for strength, energy and relief from pain.  Body maintenance is a full time job!

This week is Spring Break for my girls.  They have been incredibly gracious with me.  Their expectations for our week have been low, and they have been happy to "just keep things simple".  They have been happy to do things at home, so I don't have to move as much.  I have enjoyed watching them make up running games with the dog in the backyard, watching movies and shopping one hour at a time (mostly at the Dollar Store preparing for an upcoming birthday party).  And thankfully Oma and Opa came to the rescue and offered a fun day out while I went to physio.  So even though this week will be very different than spring breaks in the past, it has still been fun.   Thanks girls for being so understanding!!

And Easter is just a few days away.  My favourite holiday of the year.  We will mourn Christ's death on Good Friday and be thankful for His sacrifice.  On Easter Sunday we will celebrate that He rose from the dead and gives HOPE to all of us.  How will you celebrate?  Happy Easter!


  1. Wishing you and the family a blessed Easter.May God fill you with peace and joy.

  2. The girls have indeed been quite understanding, and I hope you can go and have fun with them in their future vacations and breaks. Anyway, I hope you're doing well. Body maintenance can be a full-time job, but it's good to know that you can feel that your body is gradually responding to it. That being said, I can't wait to read about your future updates, and hear about how far you have progressed in your recovery. Take care!

    Derek Sparks @ Forgey Chiropractic

  3. I’m sorry to hear about the pain you’re in, Melanie. And to think that you’ve encountered it again just after your birthday must be very frustrating. Keeping the body fit is hard work, and it is something that you can’t just set aside. Anyway, I hope things are doing a lot better for you now. Good day!

    Agnes Lawson @ Pain Relief Experts

  4. Back pains are the worst. They are the kind of pain that affects not only your physical capabilities, but also prevent you from doing your daily routines and responsibilities. It’s nice to know that despite the spring break season—where a lot of people look forward to a lot of stuff—the girls understood your situation, and kept their expectations low. Anyway, how is your back doing nowadays? Take care!

    Jacqueline Hodges @ Back and Neck Center of Brick